How to Make a Solid Decision

A young man sitting on a stool with three legs. A title says decision making is like a three legged stool.

For my oldest son. You are doing a great job and I love you.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take. Proverbs 3:5-6

Decisions, decisions. How can we make a solid decision when the present and the future are uncertain? The global pandemic seems to have stripped us of the privilege of planning. Plans make us feel better about the future. When we plan, we feel like we have some hope, some measure of control. Something better than now to look forward to. Something worth working toward. But plans require decision-making. And who can make a solid decision these days?

A wise counselor once told me that decision-making is like a stool with three legs. No one wants to sit on a rickety stool. If you know the three legs are strong and sturdy, you are more confident to take a seat without tumbling to the floor.

Decisions can be scary, especially when they involve your future.

The image of the three-legged stool has taught me over the years how to make solid decisions I don’t regret. The three-legged stool holds up even as the world falls down.

Leg One: Direction from the Lord

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

God has good plans for you and me. They come out of His love for us. We can trust His plans. But how do we know what they are if we don’t ask?

God speaks to us through prayer and His Word, the Bible. 

Prayer is simply talking to God and then pausing in stillness to listen. I have found for over 40 years now that when I seek Him about a decision, He affirms it by flooding my heart with peace. Many years ago someone told me, “when in doubt, pray it out.” Doubt, fear, worry, and hesitation are not peace. Peace is evidence of God’s guidance.

When reading the Bible, I ask God to highlight His instruction to me. Recently, I was overwhelmed by life’s cares and concerns. I opened my Bible to Isaiah 50 for my daily morning reading. As I read, two passages jumped out at me:

But the Lord God helps me…

Behold, the Lord God helps me.

(Isaiah 50:7, 9)

Again, this morning during my daily reading in Psalm 30:

O Lord, be my helper!

(Psalm 30:10)

I quieted my heart to meditate on these words. I listened for God to instruct me. The striking thought came to me, You are not alone. The Lord will help you with everything that overwhelms you. The Lord is your helper.

My heart flooded with peace and joy because I knew I would not have to face my challenges without help. The Lord is my help! What more could I ask for? I rose with new confidence and peace to face the myriad decisions of my day.

I find it fascinating that among the millions of humans on the earth, each has a distinct fingerprint and voice. Individuals can be identified and distinguished among the masses through these two features.

Over the years as I have grown in my relationship with God, I have come to recognize His dear voice, distinct among the many voices of my thoughts, my doubts, and the voices of others in my life. His is a unique and comforting voice. I know it when I hear it, just like I know the voices of my loved ones in a crowd of thousands.

As I read the Bible, I have also grown to recognize the Lord’s fingerprints, evidence of His work in my life as He leads me to certain passages at just the right moment, on just the right day, and helps me make just the right decision.

Leg Two: Wise Counsel

Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisors they succeed. Proverbs 15:22

Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend wrote a book called Safe People: How to Find Relationships That Are Good for You and Avoid Those That Aren’t. In it, they describe a safe relationship as one that does three things: draw us closer to God, draw us closer to others, and helps us become the real person God created us to be. (For more about safe people, see their list here or grab their book here).

Find out who your safe people are and seek their counsel during times of big decisions. Reach out to a few people who know and love the Lord, who know and love you, and aren’t afraid to tell you the truth. These folks are treasures. 

Also ask the advice of a few others you admire who are doing what you would like to do one day, people older and wiser who have had to make similar decisions at some point in their lives. 

Take all this counsel and weigh it in prayer before the Lord.

This last part is important because no one can make your decision but you. In the end, you are the one who will live with the decisions you make. So take the counsel you receive and lay it out before God in prayer, asking Him to help you discern what counsel to keep and what to discard.

Leg Three: Circumstances

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1

Circumstances are to decision-making like clocks are to telling time.

They can tell us when the time is right for a decision, and when it is not.

Without legs one and two, circumstances can be misleading. Sometimes God leads us through obstacle courses to increase our faith, and sometimes obstacles are there to slow us down or redirect us. It will be hard to know the difference if we are not seeking God’s direction or asking for wise counsel from safe people. 

Sometimes we need help interpreting our circumstances.

There are times in our lives when our circumstances are the icing on the cake of our decision. They sweetly confirm what we’ve gathered through prayer, reading the Bible, and seeking wise counsel.

Other times, they are a door that slams shut, forcing us to find a different way.

And sometimes they are foggy and uncertain and could go either way. We need help figuring them out.

Together with hearing from God and wise counsel, circumstances are the essential third leg that holds up the stool of a good decision.

Whatever #decision you face today, seek God, seek wise counsel, and check your circumstances. If all three are sturdy, you won’t regret the choice you make. Click To Tweet

Lord, teach me to make good decisions and lead me in the right way. Amen.

@audreycfrank

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